What is the “Parent Trap”? Simply, it is the enviable and yet also complicated position of being parents and having parents. However with no plan of action, and a life already packed with family responsibilities and career obligations, caregivers can often feel trapped and vulnerable.

The daily demands of living are difficult enough for everyone but even more so for those caught in the parent trap. However that does not need to be the case even when trying to be all things to all people. While statistics show that family caregivers can become overwhelmed and even depressed from too many demands there are ways to relieve some of those anxieties and stresses.

Relief can be found in many support and activity groups for seniors and yet knowing what and where they are may lead to the problem of getting there. An accompaniment service like Driving Miss Daisy® addresses that issue and many others – like making time to go grocery and other shopping, driving the elderly to medical and dental appointments - even staying and being in attendance with them. By taking advantage of this option caregivers do not need feel burned out. In this way Driving Miss Daisy® provides respite for those overly stressed, along with a warm and friendly addition to the quality of life for their loved ones - from running errands and some home support to social outings and even vacations. While it might be hard to let go of the responsibility of attending to elderly parents, it is also necessary for caregivers to take care of themselves.

Driving Miss Daisy® franchise owners, Susan Benesch in Victoria and Heather Thurston in Sidney and Saanich Peninsula, are compassionate, patient and sensitive women. They go the extra mile for their clients. This allows all concerned to create some essential balance in life, for both caregivers and seniors. Moreover Heather and Susan and their Driving Miss Daisy® accompaniment service can instill a renewed sense of confidence and independence by widening the circle of friendship for those they serve. In fact the very spirit of their service for Susan or Heather is to become an ongoing friend, especially when called upon on a regular basis. Weekly and monthly schedules can be set up – along with more immediate services (depending on availability) with even a few hours notice. For the caregiver, this affords not only a well-deserved break but also the assurance that his or her parent is in good hands.

And as needs change, even when an elder requires more advanced care, including a move into a nursing home or if hospice care is necessary Driving Miss Daisy® can continue to provide services and continuity for the senior during and after such transitions. Susan or Heather can be a familiar and a friendly face helping to ease people into any new situation. Even the primary caregiver need not feel as overwhelmed or unsettled by things. By providing a second set of eyes and ears families too can feel supported, knowing that there is an influential and effective advocate. Heather and Susan can make the Parent Trap feel less constraining – if entrapping at all. Most concerns and needs people have about attending to an elderly parent are made lighter when that parent feels understood and supported.

Knowing a loved one is safe and comfortable, and does not require the constant attention of his or her primary caregiver is invaluable. Indeed the highest value Driving Miss Daisy® provides is peace of mind.

There are many things that can be planned and discussed ahead of time, before elderly parents require additional care.

1. Learning if there is any type of long-term care insurance -this will provide options that may not have been considered. When looking for nursing home facilities or hospice care –contacting Susan or Heather at Driving Miss Daisy® may assist in learning about services in these areas.
2. Becoming familiar with aging parents physicians’ and dentists - older people tend to have several doctors or specialists and keeping a list of names and numbers as well as the medications and dosages used by the senior would be beneficial . Driving Miss Daisy® can also assist by attending these appointments with the senior and providing updates related to health, medication, etc. to the family member.
3. Checking about the status and currency of an elderly parent’s legal advance planning documents - Power of Attorney, Living Will, or Representation Agreement for health care. These go a long way in helping to make the difficult decisions easier and also ensure that the parent’s wishes are being kept.
4. Discussing the difficult topic of a parent’s eventual death. Are final arrangements made? Maybe there are life insurance policies or specific requests regarding services. By having the insight and courage to address such a sensitive topic, everyone can be put at ease.
5. Getting the family involved- caring for an elderly parent has many challenges and requires complete support. Having the entire family participate in decisions is in the best interest of the elderly parent as well as the caregiver. Driving Miss Daisy® operators can also provide this support. By taking the time to gently discuss the needs and requirements of elderly parents, through respectful and open conversations, Susan or Heather can then provide customized, personal services.

Discussing all these things in advance and being prepared is important in avoiding the feeling of being “trapped”. Even if elderly parents come to stay, there are still many options for support, like Driving Miss Daisy®. Susan or Heather can help with transitions from home, to the hospital, to a nursing home or into hospice care. Everywhere along the way, Driving Miss Daisy® can provide the respite needed, allowing one to be the best caregiver possible.